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Tuesday's Rant of the Day
I think Airman got the gist of what I was saying in my last blog. I hope everyone realizes this is a tongue in cheek way of expressing those things that bug me, but really aren't really that important and a way for me to laugh at myself.
I hate drivers. There needs to be a law where when I'm on the road every other fool with a car bike or truck must be off of the road. I don't need some crazed maniac whacked out on caffeine tailgating me when I'm already ten miles above the posted speed and I can't go any faster because of the car in front of me. Nor do I care for the one step away from the grave grizzled old man who thinks it's ok to drive in the fast lane doing 45. And then there's turn signals. Contrary to what must be popular thought, you do not get better gas mileage by not using them. Neither will they make your car lose value if you use them too much. Oh and that grizzled old man I talked about a bit ago. You know damned well that half the time you see him, he'll have forgotten to switch his turn signal off. Now I've learned that the easiest way to get someone to speed up is to pass them. How many times have you driven up on someone, you doing 65 and they going 60, it's no big deal, you just have to move to the passing lane and go on by. Except that as you go to the passing lane after a few minutes you noticed you haven't passed this jerk off and when you look down at the speedometer you notice that you are now doing 85 and so is the fool you were trying to pass. So you have to pick it up to 90 to finally get passed him because as God is my witness if you ease back behind him in no time will this "I got my drivers license from a Cracker Jack box moron" go back to doing 60. Now ladies may I ask an important question? When driving in the morning on your way to work are you trying to save the undertaker some time and expense by putting on your make-up while driving? I promise you that no, you cannot drive just fine and put your make up on at the same time. You're swerving all over the road and then I have to swerve which causes the guy next to me to slam on the break and WHAM, a five car pile up behind you while you're oblivious to all, only worried that your eyebrows have just the right arc. I can't forget the teen boys with their 15 year old foreign junker, on it's last legs, paint faded, with tires the thickness of pencil erasers and even more stupid is the thousand dollar exhaust system. That car may sound fast, but we all know if the kid floors it more than once all that will happen is a big cloud of smoke and it will be dead in the intersection. Finally, I'm gonna have to buy me a CB radio so I can cuss out the trucker that while behind a fleet of trucks climbing a steep grade doing 35, who thinks he needs to pull out to pass one of these trucks and I have to slam on my break because my car can climb the grade at 65. I'm fishtailing while seeing my life flash before my eyes, all so this wannabee asphalt cowboy can pretend he's starring in "Smokey and the Bandit" while leaving a swath of death and destruction in his wake.
Ah, I feel better now, hope you do too.
The views of the author are his/her own and do not necessarily represent the position of The Weather Company or its parent, IBM.