#50 'A Song to Mithras' by R. Kipling

By: Proserpina , 11:02 PM GMT on January 18, 2013

Vatican Museum

"A Song to Mithras"

MITHRAS, God of the Morning, our trumpets waken the Wall!
' Rome is above the Nations, but Thou art over all!'
Now as the names are answered, and the guards are marched away,
Mithras, also a soldier, give us strength for the day!

Mithras, God of the Noontide, the heather swims in the heat,
Our helmets scorch our foreheads ; our sandals burn our feet.
Now in the ungirt hour; now ere we blink and drowse,
Mithras, also a soldier, keep us true to our vows !

Mithras, God of the Sunset, low on the Western main,
Thou descending immortal, immortal to rise again !
Now when the watch is ended, now when the wine is drawn,
Mithras, also a soldier, keep us pure till the dawn!

Mithras, God of the Midnight, here where the great bull dies,
Look on Thy children in darkness. Oh take our sacrifice !
Many roads Thou hast fashioned: all of them lead to the Light,
Mithras, also a soldier, teach us to die aright!

Rudyard Kipling

I came across this poem while searching the poem Gunga Din. I was surprised that Kipling wrote the poem “A Song to Mithras’ but it really makes sense since he did favor the theme of ‘soldier’. I knew about Mithras from a course I took eons ago in Comparative Religions. From the above poem arose the idea for this blog.

The Secret Cult of Mithras

Have you ever visited the Baths of Caracalla? Did you see an opera performance there? If so, you were walking or sitting on top of a Mithraeum, a temple dedicated to the god Mithras. While at Caracalla did you visualize the Baths hosting five thousand bathers per day? Well, in the temple below the Baths there was a very secret bath going on as well, a blood bath. Literally.

Mithraism flourished in Rome and throughout the Roman Empire, from the First Century to the end of the Fourth Century. Yes, Mithraism appeared about the same time as Christianity, and both grew side by side. Christian worship was legalized in the Fourth Century when Emperor Constantine the Great issued the Edict of Milan in 313. Around the time of the Edict, Constantine converted from Mithraism, the religion of his father, to Christianity, the religion of his mother.

Mithraism was a ‘mystery cult’ due to the fact that the liturgy and activities of the cult were a secret. To become a member, the person had to participate in a secret initiation ceremony. As a result of the secretive aspect of the cult there is no surviving text of the liturgy, in fact no one knows if there ever was a written text. There are a few written references about Mithraism from writers such as Statius, Plutarch, Porphyry, Tertullian, Origen.

Mithra London

Mithraeum in London

There is however plenty Mithraic Iconography, physical evidence from artifacts, dedicatory inscriptions, and hundreds of underground Mithraea, scattered across the territory of the Roman Empire, from Rome to Turkey to England (along the Hadrian Wall). The area of concentration of Mithraism is most dense in Rome and her port city of Ostia.

San Clemente

Mithraeum beneath the San Clement Church in Rome

Mithraea were located below the ground, in manmade structures or in natural caves. The structures were single rooms, longer than they were wide. Long rock dining benches lined the sides of the Mithraeum, leaving a narrow isle in between. At the end of the isle, opposite the entrance, was the image of Mithras sacrificing a bull (called tauroctony). The ceilings were frequently vaulted, at times with holes to let shafts of light in.

Vatican Museum

From the Vatican Museum

The bull-sacrificing scene is usually carved in stone relief or painted on stone and placed in the Mithraea in a central location. In addition to the central scene there can be smaller scenes representing episodes from Mithras’ life. The most common scene is Mithras being born from a rock, Mithras dragging the bull to a cave, Mithras and the sun god Sol banqueting on the flesh of the bull.

Most followers of Mithraism were Roman soldiers, state bureaucrats, and merchants. In the Fourth Century the cult included a few Emperors and aristocrats. The most notable feature was the exclusion of women. Membership was limited to those who had passed through a secret initiation ritual in the seven successive levels. A mosaic in the Ostia Mithraeum of Felicissimus depicts the seven grades, with heraldic emblems that are connected to the grades or are symbols of the planets. The grades have an inscription besides them commending each grade into the protection of the different planetary gods.

The seven grades were named for one of the planets, and were under the protection of the corresponding planet:

1. Raven (Mercury)
2. Nymphus (Venus)
3. Soldier (Mars)
4. Lion (Jupiter)
5. Persian (Moon)
6. Heliodromus (Sun)
7. Father (Saturn)

There are several theories as to what the tauroctony represents. The current theory held by several scholars is that it represents a star map. The 12 signs of the zodiac and symbols of the sun, moon, and planets often appear together with the tauroctony and elsewhere in Mithraic art. For an in-depth article on this theory please read an article written for Scientific American http://www.mysterium.com/sciam.html ,by David Ulansey. Also, please visit his site http://www.mysterium.com/mithras.html

If the interpretation of the bull-killing scene is that it is an astrological allegory, then according to this view, astrology was central to Mithraism and it provided the specifics of the soul’s celestial journey.

No, I did not forget to write about Caracalla and the ‘blood bath’!

Fossa Sanguinea Caracalla

Fossa Sanguinea

In the Mithraeum underneath the Baths of Caracalla there is a very interesting feature. It is found in the tunnel that runs under the center of the main hall into an adjoining room, it is a fossa sanguinis, the ritual pit over which the bull at the center of the Mithraic cult was slaughtered. After the slaughter, initiates took a bath in the blood!

At least the blood bath was a ritual one and it did not involve human blood!

Baths of Caracalla

The Baths of Caracalla Mithraeum was found a hundred years ago. It became a tourist attraction and then it was closed for a while. A few days ago it was reopened and once again curious tourists can visit the place of a once secret mystery cult.

Suggested reading about the reopening of the Mithraeum is found here http://leapwithoutanet.blogspot.it/2013/01/the-se cret-cult-of-mithras.html

Palermo museum
Museum in Palermo, Sicily

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112. Proserpina
12:39 PM GMT on February 01, 2013
Good morning Bug. It is cold here too and getting colder. We have a light coat of snow, nothing to worry about.

Thank you for the suggestion that I look at the nest, I will now and then.

Wishing you a good month of February.
Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
111. WunderAlertBot (Admin)
12:27 PM GMT on February 01, 2013
Proserpina has created a new entry.
110. palmettobug53
3:01 AM GMT on February 01, 2013
Keep checking back to the hummer cam; Phoebe will probably lay another clutch once she shows her current offspring the ropes.

We should have more hummer viewing fun before too long.

We had lots of blustery wind yesterday and about a third of an inch of rain last night. It was still a bit gusty earlier today but by the time I got off work, it wasn't too bad.

I did have a mess to clean up after work yesterday. Lawn chairs blown over, the recycling bins half way down the street. There were so many small branches from our river birch all over the yard that I find it hard to believe there's still branches on the tree.

The wind had blown over my jade plant on the front stoop and busted it up pretty good. I got it back in the pot and I think it will recover. It lost some branches and leaves, though. I'll take the broken pieces and pot them up; see how they do.

Our temps are dropping down to around 35 tonight and upper 20's tomorrow night.
Member Since: October 7, 2005 Posts: 252 Comments: 27000
109. Proserpina
11:16 PM GMT on January 31, 2013
NEwxguy, how thoughtful of you to stop by and leave the kind message. I truly appreciate the condolences and sharing the fact that you lost your dear friend Prince. I had no idea and sending my much belated condolences for your loss.
Thank you for the birthday greeting. I certainly understand the priorities of work and other commitments. We can always catch up with WU as time permits.
Wishing you a good February. Take care.

Add: The beautiful dog in your icon, is this Prince? Gorgeous, gorgeous dog.
Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
108. NEwxguy
10:14 PM GMT on January 31, 2013
Pros,I wanted stop by a wish you my heartfelt condolences on the loss of your Koko.As someone who lost my dear friend Prince last August,I still think of him often.As you said she was a major part of your family and it takes some time to get over the loss.

Also a belated Happy Birthday,I've been so busy at work,I've fallen behind on all the events on WU.
I hope you were able to have a wonderful birthday.
Member Since: September 6, 2007 Posts: 896 Comments: 16202
107. Proserpina
8:48 PM GMT on January 31, 2013
Hi Mass, glad that the weather treated your area kindly last night. It was not so kind in other areas such as GA.
Koko is constantly in my mind and it is hard to lose her. Too hard. But time will heal the heart, to a degree anyways. She really was an integral part of my little home/family.
Good to hear from you Mass, do take care of yourself. You deserve to treat yourself kindly.
Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
106. masshysteria
8:32 PM GMT on January 31, 2013
Good Afternoon, ((((Pros)))) ~

Glad to learn that you escaped any of the serious weather just outside your area. I was quite concerned!

We had some pretty strong howling winds last night, from part of the same system, but thankfully we didn't experience any power loss this go round. Presently, it's nice to see the sun shining brightly through our windows, all traces of snow evaporated and the blustery winds lessened. What a price we now seem to pay for any unseasonable warm spell to arrive in January.

Hope each day is bringing you less pain and plenty of pleasant diversions (like your gorgeously painted sunflowers that Aqua posted). Glad that the pre-planned birthday dinner was another one. It'll take time to recover, I know, but you deserve to be as good to yourself as you possibly can.
Member Since: June 21, 2006 Posts: 90 Comments: 9677
105. Proserpina
3:32 PM GMT on January 31, 2013
Good morning. We had lots of rain last night and some strong wind gusts. Today we still have some wind but the day is sunny and cheery looking.

Shore, it seems that you have been very busy. I've checked your blog a couple of times to see what you have been up to.
Adjusting to the loss of Koko has been hard, accepting her death has been extremely painful.
No, I did not celebrate my birthday on the actual day. I felt that I had nothing to celebrate this year. However the night before a family friend had planned a dinner birthday celebration for me. For a few hours friends and my brother eased my sadness.

Angielina, thank you for stopping by with words of comfort. I appreciate the post. Also, I received your card, thank you. And thank you for the comment about the paintings.
Glad that yesterday's tornado was about 50 miles from where you live. Of course it would have been better if the tornado had not struck at all. Take care.

, it wasn't so bad here. It seems that things were a bit worse on the other side of the river. On the news they were talking about the third rescue that was in progress this morning. The usual flash floods and cars floating away... Thank you for your concern.
It was fun watching the hummer babies. The last time I looked, yesterday, they were gone. I think they are now ready for their own little family.
I will probably paint some parts of the birthday flower arrangement that R and A sent me. It truly is beautiful.

Aqua, I had forgotten those paintings. You are sweet for posting the photos, thank you.
The flowers look even more beautiful now. Many of the lilies and other flowers have opened up and are a beautiful sight. Thank you, thank you, thank you Rain and Aqua.
I absolutely love the night photo of the sunflower!

Hi Sandi and GG

I have been playing 'catch up' this morning. I guess it is time to continue my 'work'. Have a great day everyone.
Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
104. shoreacres
1:44 PM GMT on January 31, 2013
What a beautiful arrangement! Sunflowers are delightful, and they look even better surrounded by so many of their pretty friends.

I'm so sorry I missed your birthday - I know it was tinged with all the feelings of missing Koko, but I hope it was a good one. A friend in southern Virginia (the one whose farm is near the proposed uranium mine) just lost his dog - a huge white Pyranees named Joey. Joey was a working dog - kept an eye on the goats - but he was a best friend, too. It's so sad when they go.

I hope you didn't suffer with the weather last night. It's gorgeous but a little nippy here. I suppose it should be, being January and all. At least the wind has stopped and the sun is out. All good!
Member Since: October 4, 2004 Posts: 205 Comments: 15292
103. angielina
2:49 AM GMT on January 31, 2013
Just heard about Koko. I'm very sorry. I remember her as a very sweet dog and a good companion. She is missed.

Grieve not,
nor speak of me with tears,
but laugh and talk of me
as if I were beside you...
I loved you so.........
'twas Heaven here with you.

...but yet we must grieve before we can see the sun again.
Tears fall but when the sun comes they become a rainbow.

p.s I love your paintings as usual.
Member Since: September 9, 2009 Posts: 0 Comments: 44
102. palmettobug53
1:29 AM GMT on January 31, 2013
Sounds like you've got some nasty weather moving in. We don't have a tornado watch (yet) but there is a wind advisory and hazardous weather watch up for us.

Love that second painting, which is mostly blues and yellows.
Member Since: October 7, 2005 Posts: 252 Comments: 27000
101. Proserpina
1:06 AM GMT on January 31, 2013



























Sent by Fairfax OEM to voice dialer, e-mail accounts, cell phones & pagers through the Fairfax County CEAN

Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
100. Proserpina
9:03 PM GMT on January 30, 2013
Hazardous weather conditions will pass through the NCR starting this afternoon. Winds will steadily increase and will gust at 40 mph. Heavy rains and thundershowers are expected, with the heaviest rain bands arriving after PM rush hour. During heavy down pours, rain could fall as fast as 1" per hour and winds associated with heavy downpours could gust in the 60+mph range. Hazardous weather is expected to move out after 2:00 AM Thursday morning, with temperatures dropping into the 30's and 40's.

Sent by OEM Duty to e-mail accounts through the Fairfax County CEAN

Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
99. aquak9
5:40 PM GMT on January 30, 2013
Mom catches sunflowers...

...and the wind that blows them.

I just grow them, under the moon.

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98. sandiquiz
5:21 PM GMT on January 30, 2013
What a wonderful display, and it contains your favourite flowers... the sun flowers:)

Hope you are going to paint some of those flowers, or at least photograph them.

I never knew how tiring it was to "listen" all day! :)
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97. GardenGrrl
4:08 PM GMT on January 30, 2013
I thought that was one of your new paintings.
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96. palmettobug53
10:19 PM GMT on January 29, 2013
OMIGOSH! What a gorgeous arrangement!

That does cry out to be painted, doesn't it? How nice of Aqua and Rain to send them.

I just watched Baby #2 lift off. I saw the other one come and go several times yesterday and today at lunch.

I'll have to keep tabs on the webcam to see if they come home for the evening. They may abandon the nest completely in the next day or two and take up abode in the shrubbery, while Mum teaches them the ropes.

I wonder how long it will be before she lays another clutch? They said she raises several during the breeding season, which ends in May/June.
Member Since: October 7, 2005 Posts: 252 Comments: 27000
95. Proserpina
7:55 PM GMT on January 29, 2013
Photobucket Photobucket

Photobucket Photobucket

This beautiful bouquet of flowers came yesterday. Rain and Aqua are the super wonderful children who sent it to me. Love it!

I think I see a few paintings in my future (using these photos as the subject matter)!


ADD: I could not make up my mind which photo to post, so I posted several.
Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
94. Proserpina
5:30 PM GMT on January 29, 2013
Hi Bug, those are two smart hummers! They go and come back to the comforting nest and momma! It really was exciting to see the first hummer take the first flight. Good timing on my part to be observing the pretty critters. So glad that your dad is enjoying the miracle of nature!
Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
93. palmettobug53
5:23 PM GMT on January 29, 2013
Keep up with your "Hummer Therapy!" LOL

Oh, it's been so joyous, watching those two test their wings. Big Bubba seems to have the hang of it, while Lil Sis is still practicing.
Member Since: October 7, 2005 Posts: 252 Comments: 27000
92. Proserpina
5:13 PM GMT on January 29, 2013
Thank you Skye. Love your comment especially since my heart needs some cheering.
Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
91. Skyepony (Mod)
4:59 PM GMT on January 29, 2013
Nothing like glitter to cheer the heart:) Happy Birthday!
Member Since: August 10, 2005 Posts: 418 Comments: 43830
90. Proserpina
4:52 PM GMT on January 29, 2013
THANK YOU VERY MUCH for the birthday wishes and for your kind encouragement in regard to Koko. I appreciate your kindnesses.

This morning I went shopping at a local clothing store and bought a glittery outfit. Shopping is salutary for some of us during sad times. Don't worry, I do not overdo the buying and have never caused checkbook problems. Nor charge cards problems! I need the outfit for an event that is coming up soon. Still, shopping is a good diversion from one's thoughts.

GG, Weatheringpoints, Rob, Karen, Calpoppy, Kat, Bug, Alley, Bogon, Gamma, Janet, Mass, Sandi, Jus, BriarCraft, BF, Weathergeek, Aqua, Ylee, Karen, Shore, SPathy, and anyone might have unintentionally omitted from the list, THANK YOU for your kind comments in regard to Koko, and for the birthday wishes. You are much appreciated.
Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
89. GardenGrrl
10:57 AM GMT on January 29, 2013
Hey it's a Birthday. This one may not feel like your best but know it still has people in it that care about you.

Member Since: March 25, 2007 Posts: 305 Comments: 12799
88. weatheringpoints
2:16 AM GMT on January 29, 2013
I hope this bouquet will brighten your mood and I wish you better days ahead :)
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87. RobDaHood
1:18 AM GMT on January 29, 2013
83. Proserpina
Just came by to check on you and let you know you are in my thoughts.

Happy Birthday "Hot Stuff"!

Very Pretty lady, and even though we all get older,
you are, and always will be, very pretty on the inside.
And that is what matters...what last.
Member Since: September 2, 2008 Posts: 121 Comments: 43037
86. SBKaren
12:56 AM GMT on January 29, 2013
Yeah, I see the same theme....a HOT looking woman with GREAT legs and remains so today!

Koko showed me one last ‘truth’ and gave me one incredible gift of knowledge. I won’t explain exactly but she opened my eyes to see something I had not known before…

When you are ready, I'd love to know what that is. I think you are a very insightful person, very introspective, and somehow I bet whatever you learn can help others as well!

Member Since: February 21, 2005 Posts: 201 Comments: 15221
85. calpoppy
8:37 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
Happy Birthday, Pros!!! I just stopped by to see how you are doing.

Great pictures, you were stylin' back then!!!
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84. ColoradoKat
6:20 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
The theme? Great legs?!! You were a real beauty
and you still are!
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83. Proserpina
5:48 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
Here are a few photos from my work days. Yes, I am looking through some albums from my younger days.


Sitting in the teacher's lounge.


Again sitting in the teacher's lounge


My retirement party at a friend's house.

Anybody see a theme here?
Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
82. palmettobug53
5:29 PM GMT on January 28, 2013

Many happy returns of the day. I hope you do have a good day, despite everything. Koko would not want you to mope! And we don't, either.

I see you visited Dad and said one of the hummers took off earlier today. I fully expected to find an empty nest when I logged on at lunch but they were both sitting right there, preening away.

Mom just stopped by to feed them.
Member Since: October 7, 2005 Posts: 252 Comments: 27000
81. ColoradoKat
5:11 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
It is your birthday and I know you do not feel
like celebrating anything at this point in time,
and I find it difficult to use the usual birthday
greeting because of that. You made me cry again
with # 77, because I have been in your shoes,
myself, and I know how that feels. But I will
send you a birthday HUG and hope the worst of
your sadness will soon fall away and allow you
to enjoy the memories of your little angel.
I toasted your birthday (with my coffee :-)),
and that will do for now. My heart and my
thoughts are with you!
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80. Alleyoops
4:46 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
Just a little birthday wish to make you "SMILE" Happy Birthday dear Pros....

Member Since: April 18, 2007 Posts: 190 Comments: 29468
79. Bogon
4:43 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
Prose, I hesitate to wish you happy birthday, when I know you have good reason to be sad.

Still, we must do what we can for each other and hope for the best. May today bring you some measure of peace and reconciliation. May you enjoy many happy returns of the day!
Member Since: June 26, 2008 Posts: 88 Comments: 5056
78. seflagamma
3:27 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
Dear Pros,

I know today will still be a sad day for you but it is your Birthday and you deserve to have a happy one.

Reading your post above I have tears in my eyes again...
I so understand...

Try to have a good day and Koko loved you so much she would want you to Celebrate Your Birthday.

Member Since: August 29, 2005 Posts: 315 Comments: 41227
77. Proserpina
3:24 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
I posted the following on another site but the message applies here as well:

Dear friends and family, I thank you all for your kind and supportive support. It is appreciated more than I can ever put into words. As you know I like to quote those who say it better than I ever could, and so here are my thoughts as expressed by others:



"My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet." (Edith Wharton)

From the moment that I held her she was my “Lovie”, but…..

"...love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation." (Kahlil Gibran)

Koko showed me one last ‘truth’ and gave me one incredible gift of knowledge. I won’t explain exactly but she opened my eyes to see something I had not known before…

"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened." (Anatole France)

It is true what Saint Francis of Assisi says….

"All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle."

But Dear Lord I have to agree with Mother Teresa…

."I know God would never give me something that I could not handle. I just wish he didn't trust me so much."

Member Since: May 6, 2008 Posts: 201 Comments: 19759
76. janetlee
3:01 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
someone is spreading a rumor that someone special has a birthday today.
Happy Birthday♥

Those of us who have loss a much loved mamber of our family know exactly what you are feeling toward your precious little Koko. But as with all of us the good memories will start coming into your heart soon. You, Hubby & all your friends know what a very special love all had for one another.
Take care~
Member Since: March 14, 2006 Posts: 46 Comments: 1462
75. masshysteria
2:54 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
((((PROS)))) ~

Hope you'll soon be able to find it in yourself to celebrate your own precious life on earth and the importance it has had on so many many people. Continued big warm healing hugs!

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74. sandiquiz
12:09 PM GMT on January 28, 2013
{{{ I wish a very dear friend Happy Birthday }}}

Member Since: October 29, 2005 Posts: 349 Comments: 31783
73. juslivn
1:20 AM GMT on January 28, 2013
Hello, Pros. 30 seconds becomes 1 minute, 1 minute becomes 5, 5 minutes becomes 30, 30 minutes becomes an hour. You breathe through each moment and before long it gets a little easier to breathe through the memories. And a day goes by, then two...and three...

Your reasons for getting up are too many to list because, we know they are flowers and birds and kittens ;) family, and fantastic works of art and poetry. Plus, not to mention, helping your friends through their tough times, too.
The question is - What would we do without YOU? And I'm just a blogger from far away, lol.

Anyway, is it your birthday?

Add: Just re-read your comment about your dinner with family/friends tonight. Acccckkkkk...Not sure I could even do that dinner with another bichon. Wow that may put me over into a grief spell, but getting grief out is also good. Purging it and not keeping it inside is healthy. Take care. (I know you know all that above...sorry if I'm just grieving a bit with you and being empathetic? nostalgic?)
Member Since: August 20, 2009 Posts: 97 Comments: 10752
72. BriarCraft
12:47 AM GMT on January 28, 2013
Please don't take guilt trips, dear {{{Pros}}}. You were brave enough to do the right thing. Even knowing how painful it would be, you did it to prevent little Koko's pain. Mourn while the empty spot in your heart heals, but please don't feel guilty for doing what was best when the time came.
Member Since: June 21, 2004 Posts: 94 Comments: 4712
71. masshysteria
7:58 PM GMT on January 27, 2013
Quoting palmettobug53:
You'll be fine, Pros. I promise.

Hi Pros ~

I echo Bug's sentiments and also feel that it's helpful to keep busy or distracted by unrelated events right now. I'm sure your family friends and brother will understand your mixed emotions and will gladly lend support and comfort to you during tonite's pre-planned dinner. Remember, it's quite okay to be yourself.

In time, your conscience will rest, for as you said, "she would've suffered horribly" had you let your strong emotional attachment get the better of you.
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70. palmettobug53
5:46 PM GMT on January 27, 2013
You'll be fine, Pros. I promise.
Member Since: October 7, 2005 Posts: 252 Comments: 27000
69. Proserpina
4:56 PM GMT on January 27, 2013
Hi, I am going through my art magazines, food magazines, gardening magazines,... a closetful of magazines, literally. Years ago I had the closed converted to a bookcase to host my art books, etc. I am throwing away 99% of the magazines. It is time that I clean up my clutter.

I can't stop thinking about Koko. I know that I did the humane thing to put her to sleep (an euphemism to make us feel better) since she would be suffering horribly if I did not. Yet, I am the one who decided to put her to sleep and my conscience is not at rest. It hurts too much to relive over and over again her last minutes as she died in my arms. Sorry guys, I never foresaw my reaction to the loss of Koko.

I will accept what I cannot change but it will take a while.

In the meantime a family friend had planned a dinner for me that includes other friends and my brother. The dinner is tonight and I know that I have to put on a good face. This friend has a Bichon and I am dreading my reaction .... This Bichon is savvy in broken hearts, she is a visiting dog for sick people at a local hospital. Still.... I suppose my hidden talent of being a 'good actress' when I need to be, will help me out in putting on a good performance.

Thank you everyone for vising and leaving your kind comments.
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68. Barefootontherocks
4:30 PM GMT on January 27, 2013
Sorry about Koko. I know you'll miss her.
Member Since: April 29, 2006 Posts: 173 Comments: 22019
67. palmettobug53
4:07 PM GMT on January 27, 2013
Dearest Pros, I hope you are feeling a little better today.

Time will help ease the grief and, one day, you'll be able to laugh and reminisce about your sweet Koko and her ways.
Member Since: October 7, 2005 Posts: 252 Comments: 27000
66. masshysteria
3:39 PM GMT on January 27, 2013
Dearest (((((PROS))))) ~

Hope with each passing day the pain of your loss will ease. Know that we are all thinking of you, are here for you, and that you'll find some forms of strength and comfort in that.

Member Since: June 21, 2006 Posts: 90 Comments: 9677
65. sandiquiz
1:11 PM GMT on January 27, 2013
Hello dear Pros,
I hope you and hubby are looking after each other....:-)

You will see your little Koko everywhere you look for a week or two, but I do hope you don't give up on yourself....Sending (((hugs)))
Member Since: October 29, 2005 Posts: 349 Comments: 31783
64. weathergeek5
10:44 PM GMT on January 26, 2013
Sorry for your loss!! I know pets they are apart of our lives and we grieve when they die. Prayers are going up for you and Raindad.
Member Since: December 25, 2005 Posts: 0 Comments: 1746
63. RobDaHood
8:42 PM GMT on January 26, 2013
50. Proserpina
What a beautiful tribute to a very special friend.
The only time Angie ever saw me cry was when a very special pup died in my arms several years ago. They have a special place in our hearts due to their unconditional love and absolute trust. Something we rarely experience in human relationships.

My heart goes out to you. I know exactly what you are feeling. But, as you say, Koko will live on in your hearts, and apparently in many others as well. Koko is in a better place now, with no pain, bringing a smile to the spirit of a child who has also crossed the bridge.

God Bless, my friend.
Member Since: September 2, 2008 Posts: 121 Comments: 43037
62. seflagamma
8:25 PM GMT on January 26, 2013
{{{Pros}}} I see you posted here also along with those beautiful photos of Koko.

You know you are in my thoughts and I know your heart is breaking....
Member Since: August 29, 2005 Posts: 315 Comments: 41227

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