Buying a gun safe can be a major purchase. Of course if you own a single firearm or have an awesome collection, you should always keep safety and security in mind like these two fellows...or not.
First; Don't buy a Gun Safe on EBay. Go to a reputable sporting goods store like say...The Bass Pro Shop in Grapevine, Texas at around 6pm on Labor Day.
Second; Find the biggest, strongest, most secure safe that you can afford.
Third; Make sure it's a quality safe, not one of those cheap ones that will let your guns out. Remember, the liberal media has been hammering us over the head that guns are sneaky spiteful things with a mind of their own. Make sure they can't escape from the safe after they are locked inside.
Forth; Test the safe. Climb inside, sure it's tight and uncomfortable, have your buddy push really hard on the door so it completely shuts. You want to be absolutely sure that once inside and locked, your guns can't open that door and get out by themselves. If you can't get out, your guns can't either.
Fifth, yep, they must of drank one.
Uh sixth; After locking your buddy in the gun safe, spinning the combination lock and doing everything to secure it. Test to make sure you can't open it from the outside either.
Now ponder and pace for a minute. Then go get testy with a store clerk because you can't open the safe.
The manager tries to open the safe but something is jamming the opening mechanism.
"WHAT! THERE IS A PERSON LOCKED IN THE SAFE??!!!"
Call a lock smith.
Call maintenance and ask them to bring a drill to make air holes...FAST!
This is getting fun. Who knew purchasing a gun safe would be so exciting.
After the safe has been thoroughly tested by the Fire Department, the Police Department, Store Personnel and a Lock Smith all witnessed by dozens of bystanders, you know this is a quality gun safe.
When finally extricated, checked by paramedics and surrounded by both policemen and firemen, you and your buddy now have a decision to make. The store manager asks; "Would you like to pay for this high quality field tested safe in cash or with a credit card?"
Gosh I like Bass Pro Shops, they always go the extra mile to make that sale.
After the Gun Safe Demo ;-), I went to look at all the binoculars. With the sales guys help ended up buying a small $100 pair that fits in my purse and a larger $279 pair that is going to be awesome for birding.
Yep. This all really happened today.
Updated: 4:37 AM GMT on September 08, 2010
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