Dateline Feb. 2, 2012 7:05 am EGT (Eastern Groundhog Time)
The Amos Stoltzfus farm, suburban Metompkin, VA
Somewhere out here there is a groundhog! After some intense
observation, my longtime prognosticator, Metompkin Max, (he
and his entire family (including Max Jr., the current active
forecaster)) are nowhere to be found. It's not urban flight
(believe me, Metompkin, VA is NOT urban), it's not that the
family isn't happy with their "digs" (this isn't a pun, their
home is paw dug!), the groundhog hollow was newly remodeled
this summer.
My theory is that it's Global Warming! Okay, okay, to be
politically correct, climate-change-for-the-warmer. How can
a groundhog predict the END of winter when it doesn't seem
to have started?? There have been too many shirtsleeve days
since December 22, why even Santa changed from sleigh runners
to wheels well north of our our area. And just the other day
I saw a skein of geese flying not in the usual "V", but in a
well-formed Question Mark! I swear!
Though I don't feel the least bit comfortable in saying this,
when I look around for the groundhog's shadow, I see...
NO Shadow! Winter is OVER! (Winter??, give me a break!
It was 70 yesterday!!)
Please come home Max!
Your humble stand-in groundhog - Happy Candlemas y'all!
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Updated: 12:17 PM GMT on February 02, 2012
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