By: EarlB, 11:57 PM GMT on February 15, 2009
I have been a hostage of my own taking for the last two weeks, I have
confined myself while I have been letting a great viral battle rage
within me. Details aren't necessary, it is enough to know that the battlefield
is a tired place, a place under siege. I'm running short of my supplies:
sense of humor and patience.
The weather here has been quite nice for february, temperatures,
skies, ideal for someone unable to enjoy them. Every time I look outside
and think of what I am missing, I remember that had I been feeling well,
I would've been at work seeing less of this winter springtime than what I
I have seen fifty or more robins grazing by on the lawn, and they have
become my symbolic captors, patrolling, safeguarding against my early
escape. In my thinking, they should be flying north, freeing lands more
northern from their winter prison rather than maintaining warden over me!
By: EarlB, 12:25 PM GMT on February 02, 2009
Dateline Metompkin, VA February 2, 2009
At precisely 7:08am GST (Groundhog Standard Time) Virginia's Eastern Shore
resident and very own prognosticator, Metompkin Max, fulfilled his yearly
duty by rubbing the sleep from his eyes, observing weather conditions and
"Where's the sun, I thought we had an appointment? I'm through with Winter !"
So ended a season, Spring is here.
And then from a bit to the side came a less authoritative voice, piping
up, nonetheless, "models point to a 70% chance that winter will continue for
approximately six more weeks, if the 500 mb progs are to be trusted this
time of year", it was Max Jr, ("Chuck" to his buds), issuing his first-
Max Sr., never a word mincer, was quick to respond: "Frosty (his pet name
for his son), cut the c***, and give folks the facts." (Max Sr. must be a
Cardinals fan, a bit testy today, eh, Max!!) Max jr.'s first forecast, and
different from dad's!!
Max Sr. is the nephew of the exalted forecaster of southeastern
Pennsylvania, Octorara Orphie. Both are of the Marmotus rex clan, fabled
forecasters and general shunners of publicity (unlike "that Phil guy, a
Marmotus familiaris, who'd do anything for a camera"). Max resides with his
family on the Amos Stoltzfus farm in suburban Metompkin, VA.
Max would be the first to caution us that February is known for it's surprize
snowstorms, so be vigilant, keep your woodpile dry, and keep a smile in
your hearts, Spring is just around the corner, in fact according to him,
Happy Candlemas day, y'all, it's OK to take down the holiday decorations
To check on other prognosticators, go to www.groundhogsday.com click
on "Groundhog Central"
Updated: 3:28 PM GMT on February 02, 2009